Single parents and relationships

Discussion in 'Health and Relationships' started by Decentlady, Mar 4, 2017.

  1. Decentlady

    Decentlady EdChat™ Esquire

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    In this era where broken marriages and divorce rates are not uncommon we are left with an increasing population of single parents.

    After being single again, life doesn't stop nor does the need to have a partner. So, it's totally okay to start dating again in my opinion.

    Previously, in the narrow minded society this was almost like a taboo but with intermingling of cultures now it is more acceptable.

    What are your views on this matter?
     
    Last edited: Mar 5, 2017
  2. pwarbi

    pwarbi EdChat™ M.Ed

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    Personally I don't have an issue with people dating again after they have come out of a relationship, simply because the way I look at it, it's nothing to do with me what other people do. If they are parents then there is obviously more responsibility as they have to decide if dating again is the right thing to do for the child also, and sometimes if it's been a long term relationship the child might not feel easy with having a new person around.

    I'm not saying that single parents should stay single just because it might be what the child wants, I just think that before they do start dating again, they have to think long and hard about the consequences because it's not just their own lives that they have to think about.
     
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  3. Decentlady

    Decentlady EdChat™ Esquire

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    I agree with you. This is perhaps the biggest challenge that single parents encounter: acceptability of the new partner by their children.

    It may take time and adjustment and sometimes it may lead to a miserable situation in which the parent is pulled between children and the new partner. It is not an easy situation.
     
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  4. AngelaMc

    AngelaMc EdChat™ Nomad

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    :)Relationships today are far different than they were in past years. Couples in the past stayed together, with some having a glorious 50th anniversary. Today it's much different and that's okay, because with time I know all things change. Single parents I believe should date or find a nice relationship to enter into, but I also believe if you have children make sure who ever you choose is the right person for them to be around, someone that wants the whole family package per say.:)
     
  5. pwarbi

    pwarbi EdChat™ M.Ed

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    I isn't an easy situation and that's why I think that a lot of people who have children but split up with their partner will choose to stay single until the child is old enough to accept a new relationship that they may have. I've known quite a few people that have decided to put their love life on hold and concentrate on their children, not because the children have asked them to, but just because it too much of a risk unsettling a child when the original relationship ends, then them getting used to it just being the two of you, and then asking that child to accept a different relationship all in what could be in the space of a few years.

    If a single parent does embark on a new relationship, they have to take it slowly and not rush into anything because even though they themselves need to be happy as well as the children, it's the children's feeling that have to come first, and that's the price you pay for having a children in the first place.
     
  6. Belovedad

    Belovedad EdChat™ Nomad

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    I don't see anything wrong with a single person looking for love. Being considerate of your child may be the only obstacle, otherwise they should do what they want because they are not getting any younger and you never know who might be the one.
     
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  7. rz3300

    rz3300 EdChat™ B.Ed 3rd

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    This is a tough situation for anyone, but the good news is that there are resources available if you know where to go and how to ask for help. It takes a certain skill and some people have it, but for the rest of us a little help is always nice.
     
  8. pwarbi

    pwarbi EdChat™ M.Ed

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    Like you say there is nothing wrong with single parents looking for a new partner, as they are entitled to happiness just as much as everyone else is, but I just think that they need to be more aware of who they start dating. Not only do they have to try and make sure that the new partner is right for them, but they also have to try and make sure that they are right for their children as well and that can be the hardest thing.

    A lot of children will be against their parents seeing somebody else and so even if they are the nicest person in the world the children might be against them. It's at times like that though that even though the parent needs to take into account their children's view, they also have to judge for themselves because they might regret ending a relationship with a person that would turn out to be good for them both as the children got used to them as time went on.
     
  9. DR KOKIL AGARWAL

    DR KOKIL AGARWAL EdChat™ Esquire

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    Everyone has a right to live their life the way they want to. If something goes wrong this does not mean it takes away with it the right to live and enjoy life. Having a partner in life for sharing the joys and sorrows is very important and I find no harm in it.

    If anyone complains it is their own narrow mindedness and proper treatment should be taken for the cause.
     
  10. Belovedad

    Belovedad EdChat™ Nomad

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    Honestly, I'm in that situation right now. I don't like it but I've never seen my mother so happy in years just talking to someone on the phone. I've reached adulthood so I think I just have to accept what happens.
     
  11. rz3300

    rz3300 EdChat™ B.Ed 3rd

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    This is a tough one, but I would hope that most parents have their priorities straight and do not let it interfere with the basic stuff. Of course you have some where it is unavoidable, but then you just hope that there is help around.
     
  12. DR KOKIL AGARWAL

    DR KOKIL AGARWAL EdChat™ Esquire

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    I really appreciate your outlook. It is good to see your mother happy .

    Every child should accept that their parents have their own lives and have the very right to live it on their own.
     
  13. joana josef

    joana josef EdChat™ Nomad

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    Being a single parent is not a problem, but having a second relationship is not either. They just like to be loved and want to love. They want to have a person that can stay by their side when they gets older. Many sons and daughter will just leave their parents despite of the sacrifices they made for their children. But their are problems that can come along when having another relationship its either the second love life don't love the children or the children don't like the new boyfriend or girlfriend. I think its only the time that can tell when we will be happy.
     
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  14. Chickfillay

    Chickfillay EdChat™ Nomad

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    Observing my husband that's been in a broken family, it's really hard to accept that the victim of divorce are the children. They are the ones who suffer from their parent's decision. For example, when its holidays, they are torn between two families and where they will choose which house they will celebrate. At a young age, they are forced to pick which side of their parents they wanna go when all they wanted is to be together with both of their parents at the same house. So for me, I'm not against to divorce and parents starting a new relationship. Just don't let your kids suffer from the after result of divorce.
     

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