Age difference and love

Discussion in 'Health and Relationships' started by alejandrojcorrales, Dec 17, 2011.

  1. rdahl125

    rdahl125 EdChat™ Nomad

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    It definitely depends on the people in the relationship. I, for one, connected instantly with a girl I met when I was only 15 (she was 13), and we had a strong romantic relationship that lasted for 4 years and we're still friends today even though we're with different people now. Before dating her, I had never been with someone younger than I was, but honestly I didn't even notice it. If you have someone that you connect with on a level deeper than age, especially if you're both at the same maturity level, then age doesn't really factor into the equation at all. Not saying I condone relationships between, say, an early-20s man and a young teenage girl, or vice-versa to avoid being sexist and stereotypical; because most of the time that's just asking for trouble and one of the involved parties is up to no good. But if it's a few years difference, just enough to make it awkward; or if the woman is older than the man in a heterosexual relationship, another thing that many people find to be uncomfortable, then it's down to how you and your partner feel about it. If neither of you feel awkward, who cares what anyone else thinks? As long as it's a healthy and happy relationship, nothing else should matter!
     
  2. djarum1

    djarum1 EdChat™ Nomad

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    As long as both are consenting adults, what does it matter? If two people find each other and are happy with each other, who are we to set any sort of restriction on what their age gap is? And I think the older we get, the less it matters. Someone who is 18 with someone who is 28 might seem odd, but think about it when they're older. Would anyone blink at someone who is 58 with a 68 year old? I don't think so.
     
  3. camella wallace

    camella wallace EdChat™ Esquire

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    If i can recall i think it's only one time that i ever got involved with a man that was younger than me and i think we had a great thing going because he was very mature and we had similar interest..i think age is just a number and therefore should not limit us when it comes to looking a partner...i am looking for love,security,stability and compatibility...if i can find those qualities in a man it's a yes for me regardless of the age.:p
     
  4. Nikkishea21

    Nikkishea21 EdChat™ Nomad

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    I am 32 and i would never be caught dead with someone who is younger than 30. It seem as if once i got to the 30 mark everything that was 20 related seemed just too young for me. I really do not know what i could possibly share with a youngster and it is just not my type of thing to be a baby sitter for a spouse. I know of relationships taking place even close by to where i live with older women and younger guys, but i do not think that the longevity of these relationships is appealing.
     
  5. Taylor

    Taylor EdChat™ PhD

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    I've grown to prefer older women. On average, they seem more confident--more comfortable in their own skin. I'm head over heels with a lady 16 years my senior. Literally no qualms about it, either.
     
  6. Mpho Ashworth

    Mpho Ashworth EdChat™ Esquire

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    I've got no problems whatsoever with men going with younger women and vice versa, of course they both have to be consenting adults! I'd be a hypocrite otherwise LOL When I first met my husband of 8 years (still very happily married, been together 12 years) I was very wary of going out with him because he's 9 years younger than me. He was very clear he liked right from the off, but I was adamant I wasn't going out with him. He wasn't for taking for an answer, not in a stalkerish way or anything. He reluctantly settled for being friends, then set about showing me why we'd be good together.....and the rest as they say is history! Age really is just a number :)
     
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  7. Juno

    Juno EdChat™ Nomad

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    There was a new study recently, that showed people with bigger age differences were more likely to divorce. It seemed that couples that were two years apart stayed together more. I think you tend to hold on to the same common likes and beliefs if you are the same age.
     
  8. Mpho Ashworth

    Mpho Ashworth EdChat™ Esquire

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    I have to say I tend to take with a pinch of salt, the findings of many studies these days. In my opinion, a lot of them seem to be doom sayers and are about scare mongering. I'm not saying they're always misleading, but I take from them what I do and don't see them as preaching the gospel truth. I'm 9 years my husband's senior but I can quite honestly say we're fine, we argue like any other couple but it's nothing we can't work out and I wouldn't say it's got anything to do with our age difference. That never even comes into it, it's that irrelevant. These days divorce is common ground, and I see it happening right across the board. My husband is white, and I'm Black African; I bet there's a study floating about somewhere claiming that because we have different traditions and come from from different cultures, we're bound to fail as a married couple. For as long as I've known my husband, we've not come across any huge culture differences (maybe because of the country I'm from, we're not so hung up on traditions and cultures of yester year. Sad, but true). If anything, we have more in common than we don't. In terms of the age thing, he's an old soul and I'm young at heart, so I suppose we balance each out somewhere and it just works. Well, we obviously work at it like any other couple.
     
  9. missbookworm

    missbookworm EdChat™ M.Ed

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    As for me, age doesn't really matter when it comes to love. If I sincerely love this person, and if he's a little bit older than me, I don't think it's already an enough reason for me to give up on him. Maybe we would have some differences, and arguments, but we would try to work things out because we truly love each other.
    [DOUBLEPOST=1451893674][/DOUBLEPOST]As for me, age doesn't really matter when it comes to love. If I sincerely love this person, and if he's a little bit older than me, I don't think it's already an enough reason for me to give up on him. Maybe we would have some differences, and arguments, but we would try to work things out because we truly love each other.
    [DOUBLEPOST=1451893738][/DOUBLEPOST]As for me, age doesn't really matter when it comes to love. If I sincerely love this person, and if he's a little bit older than me, I don't think it's already an enough reason for me to give up on him. Maybe we would have some differences, and arguments, but we would try to work things out because we truly love each other.
    [DOUBLEPOST=1451893779][/DOUBLEPOST]As for me, age doesn't really matter when it comes to love. If I sincerely love this person, and if he's a little bit older than me, I don't think it's already an enough reason for me to give up on him. Maybe we would have some differences, and arguments, but we would try to work things out because we truly love each other.
    [DOUBLEPOST=1451893815][/DOUBLEPOST]As for me, age doesn't really matter when it comes to love. If I sincerely love this person, and if he's a little bit older than me, I don't think it's already an enough reason for me to give up on him. Maybe we would have some differences, and arguments, but we would try to work things out because we truly love each other.
     
  10. Jason76

    Jason76 EdChat™ Esquire

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    In certain parts of the US culture, I don't think age matters that much, of course, assuming we are speaking of 18 or older. Mostly the discrimination of the young against the old happens for other reasons - one being social class. For instance, certain women at a college campus might go into a rage over some 40-year-old guy's attraction to them, but not some young woman working at a diner.

    Anyhow, comically speaking, so many guys have beards nowadays that how can one spot a young guy? :)
     
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2017
  11. Decentlady

    Decentlady EdChat™ Esquire

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    Each relationship is different. I think no studies or researches can detect how a relationship will go. It could be guiding nonetheless.

    I think if two people are happy with each other, let them be. Although in advanced ages an older woman with a young guy may seem like an odd couple especially considering that the guy has hotter skirts to opt for. This again depends on the love and faith in each other.
     
  12. Glide

    Glide EdChat™ B.Ed 2.1

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    There is a saying that age doesn't matter as far as relationship and love is concerned.

    By practice, young men prefer to have a relationship with an older women. They assert that they could be treated better, loved more, and cared much by those women. In like manner, women do love to be with younger men for they really do their job of loving them, caring them.

    However, there are culture which advocates that men should be older than the women as far as relationship is concerned.
     
  13. joana josef

    joana josef EdChat™ Nomad

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    I think there is no problem in age if its ok with the family in both side its perfectly fine. Many girls now a days like mature men because its less stressful to deal with their mind set in life. Many girls like to have a good fortune with their guy, if they choose a guy that is very irresponsible because they like to have a happy go lucky life its a big big problem.
     
  14. Kenn lester Menor

    Kenn lester Menor EdChat™ Nomad

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    Age difference is not an issue, its all about maturity. If you're matured enough to handle relationships, mentallity to deal with some quarrels, your will to go further, and how you truly love a person.
    Love is not about emotions, it is a responsibility. The commitment you had agreed to go in that relationship.
     
  15. Nikko Rico

    Nikko Rico EdChat™ Nomad

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    Age doesn't matter as long as you love each other and you are not stepping into anyone else then there's nothing to fear and to be ashamed about it.
     
  16. Caguioa747

    Caguioa747 EdChat™ Esquire

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    I think an age difference is fine, but gets trickier is one is about 26 and under. Typically, you're not really stable and settled in your early-mid twenties with school, location, career, money, etc. In my experience relationships in your 20s can be more turbulent because of this.

    Share
     
  17. Chickfillay

    Chickfillay EdChat™ Nomad

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    I've been with a guy that's 4 years older than me and I get to experience a huge age gap when it comes to maturity. I don't know how to understand him since he is more advanced and i can't cope up with him. So I could say that it depends on your maturity of mind that you too could click despite the age gap.
    [DOUBLEPOST=1545118291][/DOUBLEPOST]I've been with a guy that's 4 years older than me and I get to experience a huge age gap when it comes to maturity. I don't know how to understand him since he is more advanced and i can't cope up with him. So I could say that it depends on your maturity of mind that you too could click despite the age gap.
     
  18. Millyn

    Millyn EdChat™ Esquire

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    I do believe in the saying that age doesn't matter when it comes to relationship. True love can't be measured by how old or how young you are. As long as you both are happy, understands and accepts both your strengths and weaknesses, and both good traits and imperfections then go for it, given that you don't step into others' rights and you are not hurting anybody by choice. Comments and criticisms of other people don't matter anyway because in the first place who are they in your lives to have the right to judge you?
     
  19. bravosi

    bravosi EdChat™ Esquire

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    Of course it's important. But the male must be older than female, and not the opposite.
     

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